Sitting with only my thoughts to entertain me. Yet again I've allowed a man to hurt me, not physically, but emotionally

19 April 2010

Evasiveness, suspect comments, things that just don't add up.
I'm already dealing with having been lied to, by a person who hides behind words.
Telling me that you love and miss me, but then don't want to talk to me...
Getting injured in a way that you can't help after you offered to,
I have enough stuff on my plate, I don't have time for this garbage.

I'm starting to think it's time to cut my losses and start fresh...
... yet again.

I am unhappy at the moment, but I don't need to let him have that much power over me.
It's time to start again, with a new or revised cast of characters.

Wendy

It's hard to trust someone when they have lied to you, tried to conceal things from you because they are or were feeling guilty about their actions.

Words are just words when actions prove otherwise.

Two Friends - Writings in Sand and Stone

TWO FRIENDS WERE WALKING
THROUGH THE DESERT.
DURING SOME POINT OF THE
JOURNEY, THEY HAD AN
ARGUMENT; AND ONE FRIEND
SLAPPED THE OTHER ONE
IN THE FACE


THE ONE WHO GOT SLAPPED
WAS HURT, BUT WITHOUT
SAYING ANYTHING,
WROTE IN THE SAND,

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE..

THEY KEPT ON WALKING,
UNTIL THEY FOUND AN OASIS,
WHERE THEY DECIDED
TO TAKE A BATH.

THE ONE WHO HAD BEEN
SLAPPED GOT STUCK IN THE
MIRE AND STARTED DROWNING,
BUT THE FRIEND SAVED HIM.

AFTER HE RECOVERED FROM
THE NEAR DROWNING,
HE WROTE ON A STONE:

"TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SAVED MY LIFE"

THE FRIEND WHO HAD SLAPPED
AND SAVED HIS BEST FRIEND
ASKED HIM, "AFTER I HURT YOU,
YOU WROTE IN THE SAND AND NOW,
YOU WRITE ON A STONE, WHY?"

THE FRIEND REPLIED
"WHEN SOMEONE HURTS US
WE SHOULD WRITE IT DOWN
IN SAND, WHERE WINDS OF
FORGIVENESS CAN ERASE IT AWAY.

BUT, WHEN SOMEONE DOES
SOMETHING GOOD FOR US,
WE MUST ENGRAVE IT IN STONE
WHERE NO WIND
CAN EVER ERASE IT"

LEARN TO WRITE
YOUR HURTS IN
THE SAND AND TO
CARVE YOUR
BENEFITS IN STONE.

THEY SAY IT TAKES A
MINUTE TO FIND A SPECIAL
PERSON,
AN HOUR TO
APPRECIATE THEM,
A DAY
TO LOVE THEM,
BUT THEN,

AN ENTIRE LIFE
TO FORGET THEM.

SEND THIS TO
THE PEOPLE YOU'LL NEVER
FORGET.
I JUST DID.

TAKE THE TIME TO LIVE!

DO NOT VALUE THE THINGS
YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE, BUT VALUE
WHO YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE!

"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is
fighting some kind of battle."

Rules in a relationship and broken rules.

The person I'd been seeing since February cheated on me on the day I saw the lawyer about my divorce stuff. I found out about it the next day after he posed a supposedly hypothetical question. We had talked about sleeping with other people, but only if the other was around when it happened. He made up these rules and didn't abide by them.

I'm not happy... feeling like trust has been broken.

Wendy

Trust has been broken...

Finally have a court date...

This isn't a final court date that results in dissolving the marriage, but it is to get a judge to approve a temporary parenting plan. The date is set for May 3rd at 9:30 am. I had sent the other party copies of the legal paperwork I'd filed - amended parenting plan, statement for my parenting plan, and notice of court date. That should have arrived at his place yesterday, whether he has it I don't know, but I'll just sit back and wait to see.

For now I'll just keep living my life the way I have been, seeing Nicolas from Friday after he gets out of school until the following Monday morning when he leaves for school. Which reminds me that I need to get Nic's medicaid coupon in his backpack so he'll have it on Thursday for his dental cleaning appointment.

It has taken me this long because I have been waiting to talk to legal counsel first, which I did the day before I filed. Saw the lawyer on the 14th, filed and mailed the paperwork to Steve on the 15th.

The 90 day period that's required to get a divorce in the state of WA ends on May 10th. If Steve doesn't fit at the hearing regarding the parenting plan, I'll see how soon we can get a hearing for the divorce.


The light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter, but that doesn't mean a landslide won't happen before I get there.